The Hurt Feelings Report

Share:

Even though our game of choice is called Mafia Wars, many players get very emotional and upset when they are attacked, robbed or a war is declared on them. To accommodate this group of players and to help take the burden off of Customer Support, Zynga has created a Hurt Feelings Report.  To get your blank report, go to your account drop bar menu and select "Hurt Feelings".

Download the Official Hurt Feelings Report, fill it out with as much detail as possible, and submit it to www.myfeelingswerehurt/mafiawars. Once your report is received, you will be notified in 48 hours or less with the most reasonable solution for whatever caused you to be upset.

(click to enlarge, it's funny)

If you don't feel like filling out the Hurt Feelings Report, look for the Live Counseling Session feature on the Psychological Support Home Page. This option is visible only when a Psychologist is available and you will see the image below on the right column of the page.

Here is a re-print of the Psychological Support page 411.


Hurt Feelings Report 411 & FAQ
Updated 03/06/2011 10:55 AM
_____________________________________________________


Release your emotional frustrations to our new Psychological Support Department. To facilitate Customer Support a new Psychological Support Department was created. All issues pertaining to your hurt feelings in Mafia Wars should be directed here. This will enable Customer Support to take care of technical game problem while our team of highly trained Psychologists assists you with other game related issues.

The Official Hurt Feelings Report must be completed prior to contacting Psychological Support. Locate a downloadable Hurt Feelings Report in the Account drop down menu. Complete it as honest and accurately as possible for better results.  If you don't feel like waiting for our team members to review your report and get back to you, try our Live Counseling Session feature located at the left hand column of the Psychological Support page. If all our Psychologists are busy, the Live Counseling Session won't be visible and you will need to wait for the day you can find it.

Hurt Feelings FAQs

Q: I don't see the Hurt Feelings Report option on my account?
A: Don't worry, this feature is slowly rolling out to all players and you will have it in the near future. In the meantime, enjoy listening to your friends tell you how great it is.

Q: I tried to find the Live Counseling Session on the Psychological Support page but it wasn't there?
A: If all of our Psychologists are busy counseling other players, the feature will not be visible to you. If this hurts your feelings, feel free to submit a Hurt Feelings Report.

Q: My friend was attacked 20 times and it hurt his feelings. For his inconvenience, he was compensated with 20 Reward Points. I was attacked 50 times and only got 10 Reward Points. How is this fair?
A: Each case is reviewed individually and there is no set compensation.

Q: I submitted my Hurt Feelings Report and haven't gotten a reply. What should I do?
A: Once you submit your report, a trained Psychologist will review it and contact you. If you haven't gotten a reply within 48 hours, check your junk mail to make sure you didn't miss it. Resubmit your report if you did. If you don't get a response within a reasonable time frame, try clearing your cache and restarting your computer.

Psychological Support is not authorized to offer any compensation for players who are not strong enough to defend themselves from repeated attacks. If you don't like gifting events, please visit http://ihategiftingevents/mafia_wars/ as we are overwhelmed with players who have their feelings hurt because they are unable to accept gifts.
__________________________________________________
Thanks to Michael Voelzow for sharing the Hurt Feelings Report on the fan page.  I don't know who the creator of the actual Hurt Feelings Report is so please comment if you do. I shouldn't have to say this is another spoof but just in case, it is.

Article written by Jennifer Patterson, Creator of the MW Loot Lady Blog, The Mafia Wars Loot Lady Facebook Fan Page and Co-Host of The Informant Podcast. All material is protected by copyright law